Kars-Çıldır Gölü, Ağustos 2020
I was a child who wanted to be grown up and could not understand what was the wrong about it like all the other kids out there, when I heard about Peter Pan’s Neverland, I could not understand this thought but while we are in the way called “growing up”, I really feel Peter Pan and I want to be in vessel that can take me to Neverland where you will never have to worry about growing up stuffs and you can always be stay curious without comparing yourself with others by others and yourself.
I’m imagining a very basic wooden boat damaged in same places, the road that I take to boat has little colorful spring flowers from top of the hill I walk and got into the boat when the sun is going down and the sky is pastel pink and purple like you mix the colors in Bob Ross’s color palette and we sail to the sea with my little old boat which is cleared that it made of very solid wood. I also have two shovels so that I can take my road to Neverland with my dear muscles.
While I’m rowing I feel like I’m disappearing in the horizon from our world’s point of view and at some point my little boat and I change the dimension, the time and space escalating when I arrive Neverland, the all stress I feel in my life and all the tension because of uncertainity leave my body immediately and I meet my childish and joyful self again, I reach the best power for human being which is being happy in all occasion that I defined as my secret power in my childhood era, I am still in my magical boat, I have a taste in my mouth like I had just eat my strawberry muffin, the first thing I feel is reileved and the “mature” life I had before Neverland felt like just a bad dream which must have lived to understand how cherish can be a child or having the soul of a child.
When I get off the boat on the shore, the sun is shining like saying me welcome to your true self, I feel the wetness on green grass since I have bare feet but I feel it firmly all the four corners of them, I smell the fresh air, the most freshnest air I felt in my life and I know that these are all because of the effect that brings me joy and more alive to be at the moment.
Even though it is very formidable for me to seperate from my wooden boat, I send it back to the world that we are in so that the person who wants to be him/her true self again can take it and continue his/her journey to the Neverland whenever they feel lost.
Next Day: Dancing. Who’s dancing and why are they tapping those toes?